By Donovan Hall

Trippy. Brutal. Intense. Insane. Nightmarish. These are the only words I can think of to describe the latest slasher flick, “Cabin in the Woods.”

It was like a bad trip — packed with paranoia, powerful hallucinations and overall bad vibes, man.

“Cabin in the Woods”mixes that with a touch of conspiracy, a dash of nightmares, and a heaping amount of gore. To top it all off, the movie ends with one Hell of a twist that you will never see coming.

I have to admit that I am a self-proclaimed horror fan. I firmly believe that the more gore, the better. Unfortunately for me, it’s been forever since I’ve seen one that didn’t make me want to hunt down the director and murder him myself.

When I saw that “Cabin in the Woods” got great ratings, I was ready to prove them wrong. No one is safe from my sarcasm and snark! There was no way that some played out, campfire massacre could be any good. Boy, I couldn’t have been more wrong.

I went to the latest show possible on a Monday night. Thankfully, my friend is equally obsessed with gore, so he eagerly joined — especially after I offered to pay. Choosing the late show was the perfect time to see a movie of this caliber. I could enjoy it without the obnoxious peanut gallery barking in the background.

When we got there, the entire movie theater was empty. It was actually pretty sweet, until my buddy decided to go get popcorn and left me alone with my suddenly heightened sense of paranoia. After a few minutes, I was convinced there was someone hiding behind one of the seats, just waiting to stab me.

After the first 15 minutes, the movie had us.

The movie was funny. I mean, like really funny. It was much better than any of the humor they usually carelessly toss into horror movies. At one point, I almost choked on my popcorn and I thought to myself, “A pot head wrote that.”

That’s why I wasn’t surprised when the stoner friend joined the group on screen. What did surprise me, however, was that he was so sensible. The group also included the basic stereotypes: the good looking jock, the slutty blonde, the uptight virgin and the token black guy, with a twist. The jock was actually smart, the blonde was just good looking, not actually slutty. The virgin had to been having sex and the black guy was mixed. Ha!

The film had pretty decent acting, which was a relief. I mean, sure, there were a handful of corny moments, but what scary movie doesn’t have those? There were times when I felt that it was getting to be a bit too much, but then I realized that it was supposed to be like that, which won’t make sense until you see it.

The most impressive thing to me was the story. I was expecting your basic, kids go to the woods and get slaughtered story. That was not the case with this movie. It almost seemed like it had changed genres halfway through the flick, which was surprisingly a good thing.

I actually spent the last 40 minutes of the movie with my jaw hanging wide open. I was pretty much in shock at what was taking place on the screen.

If you plan on seeing it, I suggest not reading any spoilers or asking your friends about it. It’s definitely the kind of movie that you will want to see without any expectations at all.

Overall, I enjoyed the movie, quite a bit. I thought I had the movie pegged before I even watched it, and it proved me wrong. So hats off to the people who wrote this movie. And an even bigger hats off to crazy amount of drugs that they HAD to have taken to come up with this.

As my friend and I left the theater, we didn’t speak until ten minutes after we got in the car. Neither one of us could explain what had just happened to us. Then I realized it. We had both experienced the bad trip that is “Cabin in the Woods.”